20 years ago today I fell into bed, Blissfully ignorant of the vision I would see on my TV screen when I opened my eyes the following morning. When I realized it wasn’t a movie, I spent the next two hours confirming my family was safe. They were.
There was a fear and a need for justice that I vaguely remember before living life like I had done before. You see, I didn’t lose anyone that day. But my friend Eve Bucca did.
Eve’s husband Ron served with 11th SFG, was a Fire Marshall in NYC and so much more.
Ron would play the ballad of the Green Berets for his kids often.
Ron made it to the 79th floor of the South Tower after telling her he was going in for this rescue. Eve told me they found him nearly 6 weeks later and his jacket was laying over civilians. Civilians he was undoubtedly trying to selflessly save.
After that day Eve founded Standfast Alliance to help our military and first responders develop resilience.
2,977 people were lost between NYC, PA and the Pentagon. Over 1100 remains are still unidentified.
So do you ever wonder what the last 20 years were for? I don’t.
I, as an American, get to enjoy and live life free even after the attack our nation endured 20 years ago because of men and women like you. Men and women like you have been defending these freedoms for over two centuries and as SGM Greg Kelly once told me, you do it for love. Love for your spouse, your children and your country.
In 2008 I married a soldier who dreamed to be a Green Beret. He earned that beret in March of 2011. We moved to JBLM to join the 1st Group family and to grow our own. Michael was born here at Womack, Gabriel at Madigan on Fort Lewis.
Op tempo was high and family time was so special. Daddy T-Rex was a steady request from Michael and Gabriel would just giggle and scream with joy.
In 2013 Mike deployed to Eastern AFG with 4th BN Charlie Co 1st SFG. Days into the deployment the Boston Marathon attack happened. My father was close and struggled with if he could have done more to help. Mike sent an email with words of support and encouragement.
speaking at USASOC’s 9/11 ceremony. (U.S. Army photo)
From: Bob Kolb
Date: April 21, 2013, 7:18:07 PM EDT
To: Michael Simpson
Subject: Re: Greetings From Afghanistan
Dear Bobby,
How are things? I heard about the marathon, Krista told me you were pretty close. I’m glad to hear that you are alright. I don’t know what to say, other than I’m sorry that you had to witness something like that. I wish there was something I could have done better in my job to keep it from happening. Just goes to show that some people in this world are inherently evil and we have to put our trust in God to protect us. Not all acts of evil can be avoided or mitigated, no matter what precautions we and our government take.
I have seen a few bombs go off in my day, witnessed the aftermath and even cleaned up the mess. It’s not pretty. I try not to tell my family, except for my brothers and father, who have also seen the same things. It’s not something that my wife or children ever need to know about. I carry those experiences with me every day. I have chosen to take on that burden for the sake of my family. I’m sure you have had some time to reflect on the events, your actions, the actions of others. I second guess myself every day for not taking certain actions in those situations. In my experience, you will always find fault when you look back on what you have done, no matter what the situation.d I have made mistakes during almost every hostile engagement I have been in, in my 10 years in the military, but I always try to learn from them, and never repeat them. Make no mistake, you will NEVER forget that day for the rest of your life. I’m sure you will think of it almost every day for in the near future. You will start to look at things in a different frame of mind, things that used to be important won’t be, things that used to be trivial won’t be. Don’t get upset with people if they don’t see things the way you do, they haven’t seen what you saw, haven't experienced what you did. I encourage you to take some time and reflect on your life in the future.
Dwelling on the past is for losers. Excuses are for the weak. Think to the future, the summer, your grandchildren, daughter, wife and the ocean.
Compartmentalization is an option, not the best. Don’t carry guilt with you, it’s toxic. I would encourage you to talk to someone, anyone about it. Your friends might not understand, your priest might have some encouraging words, your wife wants to nurture you. Don’t shut them out, but don’t get upset if they just don’t get it. If you need to just let some shit out, shoot me an e-mail, or call my dad. That guy has almost every been there, done that t-shirt and the wisdom to go along with it.
I hope I have not overstepped my bounds. My intention is not to judge or offer unwanted advice, but let you know that you are not alone. I look forward to seeing you again in a few months. Don’t worry about me, things here are actually very good, about as good as they can be. The locals are friendly and we have knitting circles on Wednesdays, arts and crafts on Fridays and movie nights on Saturdays.
Take care, Mike
speaking at USASOC’s 9/11 ceremony. (U.S. Army photo)
As we look back I ask you.
Don’t let the ending steal the narrative. Don’t ever let anything devalue yesterday. I know light and hope follow dark and despair. We’ve all been there, we have all lived it.
I never wondered “for what.” Not then, not now. Not everyone comprehends the level of service before self that comes with being a part of something bigger beyond our understanding.
Our military has brought Hope to people all over the world that couldn’t see through the darkness. We, as a country, empower people to DREAM BIG which is something I take for granted every day.
Freeing the oppressed, even for a short time, comes with blessings and consequences. That’s what warriors sign up for. That’s what my warrior signed up for and his blood, shed on the grounds on the other side of the world, was and still is WORTH IT.
I have been blessed to be loved by two warriors who selflessly served our great nation. Both have sacrificed in different ways but I assure you, both have sacrificed. They did it for love and it will always be worth it.
That is why we will always raise our boys to believe in and to fight for freedom. To love thy neighbor and to sacrifice oneself for the betterment of others.
I recently read in a book gifted to me by someone so special to me that “one of our greatest freedoms is how we react to things.” I’m still working on that.
Tomorrow when you wake up and reflect on the last 20 years and react to the next 20- I ask you to follow the prayer of St. Ignatius de Loyola.
“God, Teach us to give and not count the cost.”